Change is the only certainty we have. We can count on it. For most of us, change is hard and unwanted. We can learn to roll with change though, and it is transformative.
How can we do this?
Acknowledging that change is inevitable can be helpful. For me, we are in a challenging season right now in our family. Well, if I’m honest it has been challenging for a while. Knowing that change is inevitable helps me to hold onto hope, that it will get better or will change into something that is hopefully easier, happier, and more peaceful.
Acceptance of what is and working on changing what I can control, helps. Accepting others for who they are and develop healthy boundaries for myself that honours myself and others. Assess the challenging relationships, and determine if change is needed and then, determine who needs to make the change, or set the boundary, or walk away. Figuring this out can be challenging and it can be helpful to talk it through with someone else. If you don’t have a trusted relationship to talk through these types of challenges, it would be a good idea to seek out a counsellor, therapist or a coach for some help.
Acknowledging that change is hard, especially at first. In the beginning it takes 100% focus and energy, but with consistent work and effort it does get easier. Think of a time you started physically working out, how hard and painful it was in the beginning. Sure enough, momentum builds, strengthens and grows, and so do you in the process. Enjoy the process, which is easier to do when you know it will get easier and the effort will be worth it.
If you find yourself surrounded by others who do not accept you, I understand. I’ve been there. Am still there. Being unfairly judged by others, especially those who have not taken the time to get to know me, or assume they do know me, is painful. When I know I’ve been wrongly judged or I’m not accepted because because of my skin colour, my sex, my background, my beliefs, my marital status, how many kids I have or don’t have, my profession, where I live, what I drive, what I wear, and so on… We’ve all experienced being unfairly judged and placed into someone’s proverbial box. It sucks! I know I’ve unfairly judged others as well. We need to do better. Practice letting go of judgements and accepting others and even work on enjoying each others differences. It is the differences that make our world interesting and beautiful.
Asking some questions. Questions to understand and learn more about yourself and others is a helpful way to begin rolling with change.
This new year is quickly approaching. What changes do you want to see in 2022?
What changes are you willing to make in 2022?
Are you willing to go through the hard work, focus, pain and suffering to get there?
I believe in you! Roll with it!